let us bow our heads
THERE IS NOTHING COMPLEX OR DIFFICULT ABOUT THE CLITORIS I’M SO MAD LIKE IT’S RIGHT THERE AND YOU JUST GOTTA TOUCH IT
………I don’t understand why the clitoris is such a mystery
it’s right there
I mean, if you’re a lazy fuck and you don’t care about your partners’ pleasure, then maybe it’s difficult to figure out
but for fucks’ sake, it’s right there, it engorges with blood and everything to make it easier to find
srsly tho it’s RIGHT THERE
maybe we should retaliate by claiming that we can’t find the penis
“it’s right there!”
“no those are my balls”
“in here somewhere?”
“that’s my anus please stop prodding at it”
Reblogging for that last bit of commentary right there.
Hahaha, oh my god yes.
"What? What do you mean it gets bigger when you get turned on? I don’t see it… is this is?
"No, that’s my knee-pit. Higher."
"You’re sucking on my fucking nose. What is wrong with you?"
Samuel L. Jackson seriously wants to be in the new Star Wars movies. He doesn’t care how it happens, he doesn’t care how many arms he has or how dead he is, or if he has to somehow do this as Nick Fury instead of Mace Windu.
Is there anyone among us who doesn’t think Star Wars could use a little Nick Fury? (Source)
…it’s a universe with a well-established history of just cloning the shit out of people at the slightest excuse. Samuel L. Jackson could theoretically play every role in the next movie without it being that implausible, by Star Wars standards.
Holy shit I would pay twice the going rate for a movie ticket to see a film performed entirely by Samuel L. Jackson. I don’t even care what film. Star Wars, Pride & Prejudice, Sherlock Holmes, The Godfather…Any. Movie.
“From the first moment I met you, your arrogance and fucking conceit made me realize that you were the last motherfucker in the world I could ever be fucking prevailed upon to marry.”
It is a truth fucking universally acknowledged that a single motherfucker in possession of a giant motherfucking fortune must be in want of a goddamn wife.
“The fucking recollection of what I said—of my fucking conduct, my fucking manners, my motherfucking expressions during it, is now, and has been many fucking months, goddamned painful to me. Your reproof, I shall never fucking forget: ‘had you behaved like less of a motherfucker.’ Those were your goddamned words. You know not, you can scarcely fucking conceive, how they have tortured me.”
“Really, Watson, you fucking excel yourself,” said Holmes, pushing back his chair and lighting a cigarette. “I am bound to say that in all the fucking accounts which you have been so good as to give of my own small achievements you have fucking habitually underrated your own motherfucking abilities. It may be that you are not yourself fucking luminous, but you are a motherfucking conductor of light. Some people without possessing genius have a fucking remarkable power of stimulating it. I confess, my dear fellow, that I am very much in your fucking debt.”
Motherfucker, mama always said life was like a box of fucking chocolates. You never fucking know what you’re gonna get.
To fuck up a motherfucker or to not fuck up a motherfucker, that is the question.
Guys this is the kind of thinking that got Snakes On A Plane made
But soft! What fucking light through yon motherfucking window breaks! It is the fucking east, and that motherfucker Juliette is the fucking sun
“Harry, you’re a mothafuckin wizard.”
“Bitch, did I stutter?”
“A little motherfucking sea-bathing would set me up for fucking ever.”
“About three goddamn things I was absolfuckinglutely postive. First, Edward was a motherfucking vampire. Second, there was a part of his sparkly blood drinking ass — and shit if I know how strong that part of the cold bastard might be — that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was fucking unconditionally, irrefuckinvocably, in motherfucking love with the pale ass blood drinking motherfucker. “
We want the finest motherfuckin’ cakes known to humanity. We want them fuckers here and we want them fuckers now!
“One day, and that fuckin’ day may never come, I may call upon your bitch ass to do me a motherfuckin’ favor. But for now, consider this a fuckin’ piece of generosity on the day of my daughter’s fuckin’ wedding.”
“You cannot fucking stain a motherfucking black coat.”
“And none for Gretchen motherfucking Weiners, bye.”
“My good fucking opinion, once lost, is lost forever, motherfucker.”
We must be as swift as the fucking cold river, with all the force of the badass typhoon, screw shit up like the goddamn fire, mysterious as the mutherfucking dark side of the motherfucking moon.
“I’M FLYING MOTHERFUCKERS!”
The wand chooses the god damn wizard motherfucker!
Mr. Kane was a man who got everything he wanted and then lost it. Maybe Motherfucker was something he couldn’t get, or something he lost. Anyway, it wouldn’t have explained anything; I don’t think any word can explain a man’s life. No, I guess Motherfucker is just a… piece in a jigsaw puzzle… a missing piece.”
Guys Star wars happens “A long long time ago, In a galaxy Far Far away” Fury hasn’t been born yet in them.
Only if you assume that George Lucas was making a documentary. Otherwise for all we know the actual intended audience of the piece was Jack Harkness sitting around on Boeshane in the year 5122.
Also this seems to indicate a despicable lack of faith in the time travel abilities of Nick Fury.
Or that you think our current Nick Fury is not himself potentially a clone of the Furies that existed a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.
…and now I am picturing Samuel L. Jackson as all three Greek Furies.
“We’re here for vengeance, motherfuckers!”
Either way, you’ll be receiving a visit from Director Fury shortly. I strongly suggest you have an explanation prepared.
^^^all of this needed to be on my blog^^^
“I will take the motherfucking ring to fucking Mordor.” [pause] “Though I do not know the motherfucking way.”
"If by my motherfucking life or motherfucking bitch ass death I can protect you, I will. You have my fucking sword…""And you have my motherfucking bow.""And my axe, bitch.”